Just because you are not where you want to be doesn't mean it is too late to get there. If you don't think you can be better, or if you think of yourself as a failure, that alternate reality version of yourself is still living in your head. You have to be willing to risk failure in order to have the life that you want but also need a safe space where people accept that ambition isn't an asshole trait.
Sometimes you don't know you are better until you see it.
We all have a tendency to believe that we are good at what we do. And even though you can't see your potential, you may be able to see the results of your work. But how do you know if those results are due to luck or genius? The truth is, it takes time and effort before anyone can truly know for sure if their work is on track or needs more attention. In order for someone's skills and talents to shine through, they need an outlet for their creativity—a place where they can be seen by others and recognized as uniquely talented in some way. This could be a classroom setting, an art gallery opening or even at a small dinner party hosted by friends who appreciate this person’s well-honed abilities.
The alternate version of yourself is always living in your head.
You are not your thoughts. You are not your body. You are not your emotions. You are not your past and you are not your future.
What you are, is the observer of all these things.
You’re the one that makes these things happen in reality—you have the power to choose what you want to think about, how you want to feel about it and what actions will follow from those thoughts and feelings (or lack thereof).
You have to be willing to risk failure in order to have the life you have always wanted.
You have to be willing to risk failure in order to have the life you have always wanted.
You can’t know what will happen if you don’t try, and that is why it is so important for you to take risks even when it seems like there are no rewards or benefits for doing so. In fact, there are many benefits of taking risks and failing: You will learn more about yourself, how others interact with you, how they see your ideas and goals, etc. Furthermore, if the risk fails then at least now you know what not to do next time!
You have permission to want more for yourself, it does not make you an asshole.
You have permission to want more for yourself, it does not make you an asshole.
It does not mean you are better than anyone else or the people around you, it just means that you want and deserve what they do but maybe a little bit more. You are allowed to want and need more because that is what makes us human, we strive to be better at what we do and push ourselves further everyday. We are constantly learning new things every day and pushing ourselves outside our comfort zones so that we can get better at what we do as well as grow as a person overall.
You need a safe place to talk about your ambition.
To make a change, you need to have a safe place to talk about your ambition.
You need to have someone who is willing to listen, who can empathize with why better matters and will help you feel encouraged in your pursuit of it.
And you need to know that you are not a bad person for wanting something more, or feeling that something isn't right and wanting it fixed.
It's okay to want more
I think we need a safe place to talk about our ambitions. And you have permission to want more for yourself. You really, really do! We all deserve the best and that includes your best life. Don’t let anyone tell you otherwise.
But as I said at the beginning of this article, wanting more at your worst can be challenging because it exposes your vulnerabilities, which then makes it easier for others to hurt or judge you without even realizing they are doing so. So how do we create this safe place? What steps can we take so that we can build up our confidence and courage? How do we manage being vulnerable yet still stay true to our authentic selves?
Nobody wants to be their worst self, but most people are. The good news is that it's never too late to change your life. You can make a decision today and change tomorrow!
